A Little Boy Wanted A Bicycle For Christmas
His mother said she didn’t have enough money to buy him a new bike but suggested that if he wrote to Jesus promising to be a good boy in the future, then maybe Jesus might be willing to get him one.
So the boy started writing out a letter. ‘Dear Jesus, I promise to be good for one year…’ He then crossed it out and wrote: ‘Dear Jesus, I promise to be good for one month.’
Still he wasn’t happy, so he crossed it out and wrote: ‘Dear Jesus, I promise to be good for one week.’ His head in a spin, he tore up the paper and went for a walk.
As he passed the local church, he noticed a nativity scene. When nobody was looking, he grabbed the figure of Mary, hid it under his coat and ran home.
There he composed a new letter. ‘Dear Jesus, if you ever want to see your mother again…’
A young woman goes to her boyfriend’s parent’s house for Thanksgiving dinner.
This is to be her first time meeting his family, and she is very nervous.
They all sit down and begin eating a fine Thanksgiving meal.
The young lass is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the beans.
The gas pains are almost making her eyes water.
Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit, and lets out a dainty fart.
It wasn’t loud, but everyone at the table heard the pouf.
Before she even had a chance to be embarrassed…
Her boyfriend’s father looked over at the family dog that had been snoozing at the young woman’s feet and said in a rather stern voice,
The young woman thought to herself, “This is great!” and a big smile came across her face.
A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.
This time, she didn’t even hesitate.
She let a much louder and longer one squeal.
The father again looked at the dog and growled,
“Get out from under the table!”
Once again the young lady smiled and thought, “Yes!”
A few minutes later our petite heroine had to let another one free.
She let go a blast that rivaled a train whistle blowing!
Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust, and yelled,
“Move Charlie before she shats on you!”